Reasons To Never Stop Punching Hitler: He's An Advertising Schill

...and a damn dirty preppy.



In case you've forgotten why to punch Hitler (other than, you know, the whole "Hateful, Racist Genocidal Madman" thing), you can check the other reasons here. And maybe one day, I'll replace those dead photobucket links.

Thanks to Beaneater for the pic.

Reasons to Never Stop Punching Hitler: He's Interfering With Our Healthy Desires

Man, there sure are a lot of things you can do with Hitler.




But I still like punching best.

Not sure who created the first picture, but the second was found here.

Thanks to The Alibear for "Givin' it Up" and to rcs for "Givin' the Thumbs Up."

Reasons to Never Stop Punching Hitler: Proctology is Vital to this Nation's Security

We all know Hitler did many an evil deed (even, if you believe folks like Glenn Beck, making America elect Obama as its first Secret Kenyan Muslofascist "President")... but his war on America's proctologists still stands as one of the most vile black marks of his hateful regime. Luckily, the Land of Freedom and Jesus was not to be deterred:


From a field report, highlighting one of the may confrontations between Evil and Anus:

It's the middle of the night outside of Berlin. Dr. Goebbels sleeps fitfully, as if he knows something mean is lurking in the woods outside. The window of his picturesque little cabin is open, nothing but the cold night air moving through. A strong breeze beats through the forrest, trees creaking. The man moving through the cloudy night casts no shadows, makes no noise. Minutes later, he's through the window and inside. No lubrication, just two strong arms and one very long glove.

When it's all over, the man vanishes into the night. A note is left on the floor: You just got served. - The U.S. Proctological Corps

Source

Reasons to Never Stop Punching Hitler: Painful Puns

Oh zombie Jesus, Hitler deserves a brutal beating for this:
No credits here. If anyone knows who made this, lemme know.

Reasons to Never Stop Punching Hitler: He Keeps Making Money

Well, sort of. Ch-Ch-Check it out:

LONDON (Reuters) - A series of paintings believed to be by a young Adolf Hitler fetched nearly 98,000 pounds ($143,000) including premium at an auction in Britain, well in excess of pre-sale estimates.

Among them was a watercolor of a pensive figure sitting at the end of a stone bridge with the letters "A.H." written beside it, which sold for 10,000 pounds.

Fucked up, right? I mean, let's break this down: 1) I'm no artist, but Hitler's paintings are basically like Paint-By-Numbers for people that hate dreidels, 2) Paying $143,000 for Hitler-produced artwork is worse than Communism, 3) How come we ehn't seeing any of that fat money, huh? We have drug habits to feed too, dammit.*

But, I kid. We do this for the love of the craft, not the fabulous prizes, hot babes, or truckloads of money Wolter promised me when we started this. It's all about the love, baby.

*Note: the seller is probably not a drug addict.

Hat tip to Rat Patrol for the lead on the story

Note: All kidding aside, this will be my last post here. Keep up the awesome work Wolt. Good night and good luck.

Reasons to Never Stop Punching Hitler: Awkward Sexual Tension

A variation on the propaganda poster from yesterday:

So, ladies, if you don't have anyone to cuddle with the Flex is still available.

*ahem*

Anyways, and even though it's not technically Hitler I thought y'all might like to take a gander at the "legacy" of the Driving with Hitler propaganda poster:

Topical!

Hat tip to Dr. Medulla for the Maher poster. Our very own Wolter dug up the Cuddle poster.

Reasons to Never Stop Punching Hitler: Conservation

In this entry of a continuing series of reasons why Hitler should be punched at all times, we give you an eco-friendly one:

That's right. Carpool and conserve or Hitler wins. And that's why he should be punched, dammit. It's that simple.

This propaganda poster was made by Weimer Pursell in 1943 and printed by our very own guv'ment. Hat tip to Olaf for the pic.

Look for variations on the theme tomorrow.

Reasons to Never Stop Punching Hitler: Bestiality

That's right, Hitler was into getting the loving from our four legged friends. Here's proof:

Of course, you have to figure Scooby is playing the long con on this one.

Hat tip to Marky Dread

Reasons To Never Stop Punching Hitler: #1

Because if you don't finish him off, you'll have to start all over again if...


I've actually seen this movie. And it is not Nestor Paiva's finest work. Also, the actual movie has a painfully unconvincing Hitler head in a jar, not a disembodied brain. Thanks to David Soderlund for reminding me of how bad it was.