Follow Your Leader

I've been really lax with HGP lately, and for that I apologize. There's been an illness in the family and a wedding to plan, as well as my job actually requiring me to, you know, work...

But then longtime reader and contributor Mark reminded me that today was the day Hitler did the world a belated favor and punched his own ticket:

HAPPY HITLER SUICIDE DAY!

CELEBRATE RESPONSIBLY!

Both rcs and thealibear submitted versions of the second pic ages ago that I misplaced. I found the first one while looking for the second. And decided to give you both.

NICK FRIGGING FURY.

I feel just awful for missing yesterday, but there were a lot of personal things on my plate.

To make it up to all seven of my remaining readers, I give you this classic slice of alternate history:

Hitler eats temporally tangential lead in FantasticFour #292, by John Byrne and Al Gordon.

Thanks to Olaf.

Can the Balloon Juice and Hit Something!

Literature's nice and all, but I bet you've all been missing the sweet kiss of fists on Hitler's face.

Thankfully, Uncle Sam is here to change that:


Thanks to rcs for the picture, which he found here. You can click on it to enlarge.

And because he has a poet's soul, rcs also composed this limerick:

There once was a man from Braunau am Inn
Whose vision of the world was quite grim
Old Wolt made this site
So we can swing day & night
And punch Adolph's mug at our whim!

Which is the first time anyone has written a non-dirty limerick about me. Thanks!

More Poetry Corner!

I got so excited about remembering to hang Hitler on his birthday, I almost forgot that today was one of my posting days.

Have another collage poem!

Time To

I am made of shellfish tick tock tick
He encounter globe make gesture
Come at swingin', come at swingin'
I sit in one of the dives on
Firebomb jag, write them as are
Give Adolf the rough end of the stick
The swift rendering unto, the hot house
There may, four candles grouped, as is,
With Elmer Fudd in Warsaw Ghetto
This Count Basie Orchestral Maneuvers in
The thee the thou the wendigo blues
Lightly brown a pound of ground
Take a number, punch that Shitler
Sometimes it happens that an image
Is not forthcoming, so come at him
Swinging

Thanks to Gene Mayes for the erudite Hitler Punchery.

Happy Birthday, Hitler!

Let's celebrate!


I almost forgot what today was. No way I let Adolf get his birthday off, even if that means I have to come into the HGP offices on my off day. And hey, if you like this one, you can buy it.

Thanks to rcs.

HGP's Poetry Corner!

Happy Monday! It's time to give you illiterate HGP readers some culture. Some culture with fists.

Longtime HGP reader (and one of our first contributors) Gene Mayes has given us another slab of two-fisted poetic justice, this time a collage poem:

Cold Soup in the Bathroom

They often wander for the wandering
The old prizefighters; Henry screwed the day
And nightly scissored his canned brown bread
Why not chase the moondog? Hitler creeping
All lyrical abstractions correct and accounted
For lying still and sleeping, Daffy Duck
And hollowpoint rounds--Hitler saw and ducked
The first punch, the second, not third
The hard bread breath of, the sticky lights of, of
Mussolini hidden with hardboiled eggs in aspic
Jiggling, Hitler crying now, bloodied and
Vaguer stuff can still decide the day, Henry screwed the day
And nightly punched the Führer they called him
They often wander for the wandering, dog moons
And nicer stuff, ducked or lying under gelatin cover
Punch him harder
It's a dog's world

Thanks again, Gene! Here's your Fun Bucks. And remember: Hitler Punching is for everyone! Send your examples, in whatever medium you choose, to HitlerPuncher AT gmail DOT com.

In Case You Forgot To Pay Your Taxes...

Donald Duck has some words for you:

If you don't want to watch the whole thing, the best part starts about the 2:00 mark.

Thanks to Tank for the heads up.

Take That, Wax Hitler!

I got sent this link a while back, but I totally forgot to put it up:



Gotta love a man who straight up can't even stand a wax model of Hitler.

Illustration by Thomas Kuhlenbeck. Thanks to rcs for the link.

This One Has Been Making the Rounds

So I might as well toss it up before it becomes old hat:



Thanks to both Adam and Neil for this one, sent independently. As the watermark shows, it can be found here.

Well, This Was Unexpected

--ly Awesome.

I'll fully admit to not being very familiar with Hack/Slash, but color me intrigued.

Thanks to Olaf for the photoshop. Cassie Hack created by Tim Seeley.

Look At This Fucking Hitler...

You, know...I hate hipsters as much as the next aging former punk, but sometimes a stopped clock can still tell time.



And yes, I found it at Look At This Fucking Hipster.

It's Been A Year!

Well, a year and two days, technically.

I'd like to pretend I have this huge, wonderful surprise for you...but I'd be a lying bastard in that case.

Heck I even forgot to put up my easter pictures. Shame on me. I guess you can see my easter stuff a week later or something...(man I kinda suck at this).

At any rate, there is no friggin' way I celebrate a full year of HGP without including a pic of the master:



Original Hitler-Punchin' art by Dan Stryker (perfect name for it), found by Olaf.

In Which I Do an Internet "Meme"

Well, everyone has seen the edited Downfall clips of Hitler by now. I've avoided showing any, but this one actually includes some Hitler punchery, namely a reference to this video.



Thanks to David for the link. And thanks to kpostassium for making me chuckle.

P.S. I put "meme" in quotes because I don't want to piss off the Buddha Dada.